Don't run, but WALK! At least this year...

Good evening world! Im super excited to report that I have people looking at this! Some in Germany even! (Totally random following, if I do say so myself, but I will take it!) While I was worried that I wouldn't experience the self satisfaction of counting how many "Likes" or comments I got, like on Facebook, I was relieved to find a lovely little tool that shows me where everyone logged on from. At first, I was positive that most would be just me or my husband, but it's not! Yay! I had Ipads, Iphones, Androids, Windows and even a couple Blackberry folks logging on! I am an equal opportunity blogger!

So- lets get down to business! This week the office is abuzz with all the excitement of the upcoming Earth Day 5k and half marathon. We actually have people that are just chomping at the bit to run in one big circle on the pretense that doing so might save the earth. Ha ha ha. I don't believe it either.

I admit, I have run power walked strolled the 5k myself. Twice. The first time, I started from a co-workers house, had a glass of wine then ended at her house where we finished off a bottle. I needed the bottle to shake off the shame I felt when I realized that many of my co-workers (and for some reason, their families?) were patiently waiting for me to saunter across the finish line, while chatting it up casually with 2 other less inclined ladies. They cheered. Probably because they could all go home now. The second year, I was with a little rowdier crowd. My team lead convinced us all to go to the local watering hole PRIOR to the race. Five of us intended to run.  One bailed after the bar. I ran power walked strolled with one other girl. I managed to shave off about 7 minutes and felt pretty good about that little accomplishment. Year three I fully intended to shave at least another 10 minutes off. I had a plan. It involved so much more than just working out. I had a diet plan in place. I had an exercise routine. I lost weight and I have to admit- I looked good! My dear friend Kerry told me regularly how impressed she was with my resolve! My husband thought so too! So much in fact, that he helped me out with my exercise routine! We worked out together a lot! Ok that's a lie. I think he helped me out on the Bowflex once, bought me an elliptical and then got me pregnant. In that order.

Now I fully realize that women are totally capable of working out while pregnant, but I am not one of those women.  Ask Kerry, who once while we were shopping (our preferred form of exercise- ask her husband, he'll agree 100%), quite delicately asked me
"Are you worried the baby is going to fall out?"
Me- "Um- nope"
Kerry- "Then why on earth are you walking like you have a really big pole stuck up there?"
It was true. After years of trying to have a baby, once I found out that this one was going to stick, I closed up like Duluth in the winter. There would be no year 3 5k for me.  Instead, I delivered a very healthy baby girl and promised myself I would do the 5k in 2013.

This time I was a little more gentle on myself when devising my workout plan. I joined a gym, and became a regular. I would show up once, maybe twice a month. One time, I showed up three times that month. They asked me for my ID, so I am pretty sure they were convinced someone else was using my card, because really, nobody could be THAT dedicated. I worried that some might begin to look at me as a gym rat, so I have scaled back a bit to a monthly visit, where I check to make sure my card still works.

After that, I fell back into my tried and true method of training. Shopping. It was so much easier! Not only did it smell better, but I had a dedicated partner for this routine. Quite often, Kerry and I found ourselves out of breath and complaining of the sweat dripping down our backs, cracks and cleavage while we tried on clothes. We had to have been burning calories if we were sweating that much! While I'm sure I spent more on this routine than if I had say- purchased a trainer at the gym, it was definitely more fun.  However, FUN is nowhere to be found in a true workout program. At least in my experience. This "program" I was on, has brought me to today. Three days from the 2013 Earth Day 5k and in roughly the same shape I was in 3 months after giving birth. Something was telling me that I might not do any better than I had in the past, but I figured I could at least have fun trying again.

My biggest concern? Find a suitable walking partner. I had lots of people that I knew were signed up that I could go with.

First there was Sheila. I had just started working on Sheila's team about a year ago and being from the same town, we have found that we can both have a good time together... if there is a beer, some good jokes and maybe a little eye candy involved. While Sheila swore up and down that she "probably couldn't run much" I knew better. She has a competitive streak in her and I knew I would get out there with her and all of a sudden she would bolt, fueled up on her Sugar Free RockStar Energy drink and a desire to be all that she can be. Big thumbs down from this girl.

Then there was Cassi. Tall, skinny, Cassi, who would probably wear something with little wind resistance and would do a lot of stretching at the beginning of the race. Cassi, whose walking strides tripled my own stubby little legs in a jog. Not only would she have left me in the dust, but I would have looked like one of the munchkins chasing after Glinda the Good Witch of Oz. "Take me with you!!" I would yell. No... She wouldn't do. I needed... I needed my Kerry.


Instant Messenger:
Me: Will you do the 5k with me on Friday? I have no intention of running. I just need a walking buddy.
Kerry: Whats the weather going to be like?
Me: Cold
Kerry: I'm tempted, but it sounds terrible. No. (Kerry has a very small window of opportunity where she will exude any energy outside. This window is approximately between the temperatures of 52 and 55.)
Kerry: Why don't you come over and we can walk on my treadmill?
Me: That will never happen.

Truth be told, it sounded awesome. I knew I would get over there and we would attempt to get on the treadmill, make fun of each other for sweating profusely, complain about how we had to wear two bras but all it really did was increase sweat production and our boobs still hit ourselves in the chin OR stomach if we ran too fast and then we would decide it was enough, watch tv and eat something she had prepared with her vast collection of Pampered Chef tools. I was SO close to telling her yes. I even went over to the coordinator to find out who was running so I could possibly offer my spot up to someone who had perhaps missed the deadline.

Horror of all horrors awaited me though. My BOSS was running. Not my team lead, not my manager, but my BOSS. Let's just call him Boss to keep things simple. The last thing I want Boss to think about me, is that I'm a quitter. So with slumped shoulders and the fleeting thought that maybe I'll break my leg or get pregnant before Friday, I turn to head back to my desk, however I am interrupted by the Heavens opening, shining a bright light into the office and the sound of angels singing. (Actually, it was just Sara telling me that she would walk with me, but I will go to my grave with the first version of the story.)

So now I have a walking buddy. I may not shave off any time from my walk, but Sara has a sharp wit that i thoroughly enjoy and since she never joined the gym after a traumatic wisdom tooth surgery, I don't have to worry about her bailing on me and leaving me alone to find my way around the circle.

Oh and I'm serious about getting lost on that big circle. My friend Sue accidentally ran a 10k not too long ago. It was terrifying for her. It was so cold that her phone died so she didn't have a GPS or music. We don't have the sun here in Minnesota, so she couldn't rely on that for guiding her home. It was a miracle she made it to the finish line alive. Tears of joy and relief were shared among many. This Friday I will be wearing a "Live Strong" bracelet in her honor.

Wish me luck!